#23: Remember Names and Faces
Hello everyone, and welcome back for another Tidbit! This is the third in a series of four memory-related Tidbits.By now, you've probably realized the value of detailed visual associations with respect to recall memory. Thanks to the design of our brains, visual memory is much more prominent than verbal memory. The Loci method, which you have seen discussed at length in two separate Tidbits to date, harnesses the power of this advantage of visual memory, along with the immeasurable dependency of locational memory (hence the name Loci... in fact, here's a fun little morsel of info: the phrase "In the first place" was developed thanks to people in ancient times using the Loci mnemonic to aid their recall!).
But how can you apply the basics of mnemonic methods to help you to remember names and faces?
You meet new people all of the time; possibly even several times a day. And if you're anything like the rest of us, you're terrible at "remembering" their names. There are a number of reasons why this problem exists. First, however, you must realize that memory of names and faces is not so much a recognition issue as it is a recall issue. You probably recognize plenty of people whom you cannot place. This is the result of your subconscious recognizing the person but being unable to successfully associate a name with the person's face. Oftentimes, you'll be speaking with someone, you will exchange names, and only a moment later you'll already have "forgotten" the name of the person with whom you are speaking.
The first mistake? Most people don't get the name to begin with. They never got it, so they never actually forgot it. In fact, a huge percentage of people never even really pay attention to the introduction of their conversational partner, mostly because people are so self-important by nature. Research has shown, for instance, that the more self-conscious you are, the worse you are at remembering the names of people you meet. The main reason why is that during the introduction sequence, you are almost entirely focused on what you should say to look good, and when you will get to say your own name. As a result, you never even pay attention to what the other person is saying.
So, needless to say, the first thing you need to do is 1) Pay close attention to the other person as they speak their name to you. Spell it out in your mind. If you have trouble spelling it, ask them how to spell it. If you think you may have misheard the name, ask them to repeat it. Try to say their name again a couple of times during the conversation (people love when you say their name anyway--it's the sweetest sound in the world to them). None of this stuff is rude--it's just extremely helpful to your memory.
But the second problem is that names are verbal in nature, and they're also frequently arbitrary. In other words, it's difficult to associate a concrete image with a name. However, by taking advantage of the keyword mnemonic that you read about in Tidbit #22, you can find a word or person that is closely associated with the name and develop a mental image of the name in your mind. So, the second step is 2) Develop a concrete image in your mind of the name. This could be a phonetic association (Mike = Microphone), an existing mental relationship (Carey = John Kerry), or a homonymic association (Baker = Bread). As you can see, relationships can be made not only with first names, but also with last names--the latter just takes some practice. At least with regard to first names, a mental association of some sort should only take you a matter of seconds. This mental association, once you've got it, if your first visual component to the memory.
Next, you'll have to 3) Find some defining characteristic of the person. This doesn't have to be physical (and, in fact, often it's better if it isn't). For instance, it sometimes helps to do something you are generally told never to do: judge them. For instance, perhaps the person looks like a bully. Your mental picture, then, could be a bully being a jerk to a kid. The reason why you don't want create associations based on mild physical variations is that most people have loads of trouble trying to recreate an accurate description of the person in their mind based solely on their physical deviations. However, if the person is extremely fat or has a huge nose, you might want to take that and run with it. This is the most difficult part of the entire process, but with practice, it's not that hard at all. A good tip would be to go with the first vivid association that comes to you, as this is likely the first thing that you will remember during the recall phase. This mental picture of a defining characteristic is your second visual component to the memory.
Once you've got your two visual components, then all you've got to do is 4) Associate the two visual components into one picture. For instance, a bully and "Baker" might be a jerk beating up on a loaf of bread in an oven. Try to picture the person you are placing as the bully, although you do not have to. Finally, 5) Rehearse this visual association, in detail, in your head every so often for a couple of seconds. It doesn't take long, and it'll eventually become very easy to recall. It helps to rehearse at least once after the conversation has finished as well. Make sure to say the name in your mind as you rehearse the mental image.
Once you've completed this, the next time you meet the person, you will see the mental picture you concocted, and your logical memory will then lead you to recall their name. Even if this doesn't work 100% of the time, your chances of remembering names are exponentially better if you aid your memory in this fashion. And while it takes some practice, believe me when I tell you that it works.
Here's the process once more in summation:
- Pay close attention to the other person as they speak their name to you.
- Develop a concrete image in your mind of the name.
- Find some defining characteristic of the person.
- Associate the two visual components (the name image and the image representing the characteristic) into one picture.
- Rehearse this visual association.
~os